See Mom I was right! Or maybe you were. It's debatable.

Here's a european fashion tip. Yellow mustard everything is back…with a vengeance.

Funny thing is, one time in my life I owned a pair of mustard yellow jeans…that got me kicked out of chemistry class because they were so fucking hideous my chemistry teacher couldn't attempt to teach a class whilst looking at them.

A little background.

I was a dumb kid. An even dumber teenager. I was and am still very impressionable. At or around 1990 my hero was Parker Lewis. Fox had just recently become a channel and one of the first shows they rolled out on their fledgling network was Parker Lewis Can't Lose. A total rip off of Ferris Beuller's Day Off, but amazing never the less. Besides Parker's couldn't give a fuck attitude and his god like hair,  I was mesmerized by his fashion sense. All sorts of silk shirts. Crazy pattern and colored jeans. He was the embodiment of 90's fashion and I wanted to be just like him.

So on my something or other birthday I asked my mom, neigh demanded that she take me to the local Chess King and buy me his entire wardrobe. I was pumped. Or amped. Or whatever kids were saying at the time. Upon entering this bastion of fashion, I found the outfit I had to have. A white silk shirt adorned with multi colored polka dots, and mustard yellow jeans. Hell yes. This outfit was the tits. Or the flap jacks. This was the outfit that would vault me to the top of the social circle of my peers. 

My mother wasn't buying it. Literally. I think her words were, "I am not buying that. It is awful." Of course I responded with the timeless response "Whatever Mom you just don't get it." After minutes of begging, she caved and bought the outfit. I think her parting words were "it's your funeral."

Fast forward to unveiling day. It was early in the semester. Time to bust out all the awesome clothes you bought during break. I slid on my mustard yellow pants while blasting 95 South. Buttoned my silk polka dotted shirt (shit felt fancy). Clipped on my gold necklace showcasing a gold marijuana leaf, and my Nikes. I was ready to fucking kill this day. Side note: At the time, I was attending the most prestigious boarding school in the country. This was the land of the Guggenheims, the Bunns, lacrosse, Black Crows, and Huey Lewis. This was not the land of Mustard colored jeans.

I walked to class, strike that I pimp walked to class. I felt awesome. I WAS PARKER LEWIS! AND I COULDN'T LOSE! That was until I walked into chemistry class.

I sat in the front of the class cause you know that's where geniuses sit, and was promptly told to go home and change. I can remember my Nigerian teacher saying something to the effect of, "I can not teach this class with you looking like that. Go home and change."

So I did. Absolutely gutted. Stupid yellow jeans. My mom was right, they'll never catch on.

Until 2014 when every single person on the street is wearing mustard yellow. Hot dog vendors. Bus drivers. Homeless Hipsters. Bankers. Asian tourists. Everyone!!!!!!